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A certain ***** lady, whose wit is only eclipsed by her beauty, was on a certain occasion, the local point of admiration, and had more satellites than Saturn. Among the number who were only too happy to do her the slightest pleasure, was a ***** man of the modern school of beauty, with a good deal of jewellery and a very little moustache, which, by dint of much coaxing and petting, had just made its appearance upon his upper lip, in its most incipient and insipid stages. The ***** lady , to test the gallantry of her admirer, presented him with an almond, and requested him to crack it for her. Only too glad to do her bidding, and searching in vain for any other means, he cracked it with his teeth, and handled it to his inamorata, when the following short but pointed dialogue unsued:-"You have very sharp teeth," remarked his teaser, drily. "Very sharp, I assure you," he replied. "Would you believe it -when I was a boy, I used to amuse myself by biting off the heads of birds and chickens?" "Oh, indeed, very probable," replied the lady, "I could have guessed as much; I think I see some of the down upon your lip!" Our informant adds that the ***** dandy struck a bee-line for a barber's shop, and has never since attempted to cultivate a moustache.